Grandma always told me to be careful pointing the finger as there are three pointing back at me. We all know people that can never own up to a problem of their own creation. We have all seen that person that can never let the words "that was my fault" pass their lips. Why is it so hard for some of us to admit guilt. I suppose we could blame it on the insurance companies, the first thing they tell us is "never admit guilt" which should tell us something about them. The human condition is exactly why we should always measure twice and cut once. There are three rules we should all abide by: #3) construction should be an exact science but rarely is, #2) never admit fault to your wife unless you are prepared to live with the fall out for the rest of your days, #1) if they are not biting on Mepps spinners or stink bait better just try your luck on another day.
In my fabrication days, I noted that often times when an old boy wasn't paying attention, he would fill a seam with the wrong filler metal. This would often happen right before or directly after what is affectionately referred to in Oklahoma as beer-thirty. This is to say that the most likely time to see a mistake is Friday afternoon or a Monday morning. I understand that young men need time to blow off steam, but people who were receiving these vessels at the refineries also had the right to go home to their families at night. That seems like a fair request to me. For every Ying there must be a Yang, or so I'm told. Poorly designed filler metal won't become a problem until said weld seem is exposed to 3,000 PSI, then it goes from being a paper weight to being a gigantic bomb. Our seams were under the protection of a metal stamp with our name scribed on them but there was always the one fellow who refused to stamp his. Clearly, that is nothing more than an admission of guilt. If one man refuses to follow through and properly do his job is that fair to the others who abide by the rules? If you have been using a company credit card you will want a receipt for everything, right? If you don't you may have been spending your time gathered around an aluminum stripper pole. Can you smell the cake I am baking folks?
Speaking of laying the blame on others I was busy about the house the other night mopping... WHAT, men have been known to mop twice a year! Anyway, while I was busy doing my chores, I heard a television commercial that stopped me dead in my tracks. I have heard disclaimers in the past that spanned everything from hammer toe to low resale value on your home but this one took the cake. One thing you can always bet on is whatever they are selling will usually be unplausible. The medication was something called Mirapex and it is advertised to treat something called "restless leg syndrome." Understand that I don't doubt the problem exists it's just that I have questions. Why is it called restless LEG (singular) instead of LEGS (plural), don't most of us have two? Is this like the phantom peanut allergy problem that seems to exist in our world today that was nowhere to be had when I was a lad? It might be like the sunscreen phenomenon that existed when I was a kid, mom was forever on my case about setting too close to the television where (in her own words) "I could go blind." But sunburned shoulders were never an issue for her. Am I the only one asking these questions about the past?
Are you ready for the disclaimers? I'm not sure you are but just in case you really ought to be setting down. They are as follows: "compulsive SHOPPING, compulsive GAMBLING, binge DRINKING, and a possible fixation on SEX. WOW! I think I can now peacefully pass away from this world as I have now heard it all. I wish I was just making this up purely for comical affect but I'm not. Obviously, I am highly lacking in a medical degree so my understanding about the eccentricities of the human brain and its neurotransmitters is limited but isn't that reaching just a bit? Can you imagine your wife racking up a thousand-dollar credit card bill at a swanky boutique and then blaming it on her prescription? A any rate it could be a seedling I may have just planted so if you are searching for an out, your welcome.
There are of course a few other side effects of this medication and here are just a few. Hallucinations, dry mouth, skin rashes, back pain, low blood sugar, fatigue, and yes of course, involuntary leg movements. So, the very problem people are taking said medication for to begin with is a side effect. You know how much I love absurdity. So, the question of the day becomes this, instead of taking your chances on such a risky medication wouldn't you be better off with a restless leg?
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