Women's Anger

Certain phenomenon has existed nearly forever, but as a man sometimes it takes a while for me to catch on. I often ask myself why it is necessary to have locks on convenience stores that are open 24 hours per day. I ask myself if you live at the end of a dead-end one-way street, how do you get out? I often wonder why only in America can you drive on a parkway and park on a driveway? And we can all accept that those who dine alone could be allergic to deodorant. Sometimes I am slow on the uptake, that could be why the subject of women's anger may just now be coming to my attention.

I am not a woman, but I don't mind speaking on their behalf simply because I have their best interest in mind. Woman-wise I come from some pretty hardy stock. I watched some of my great aunts rule their ilk with a broken yard stick. I watched my granny cuss a bull so hard he wished he was a heifer, and he began to squat when he peed. My own mother blew her top when she found out I copied my algebra homework out of the teacher's edition (who could blame her). Allow me to lay all of my cards on the table and admit freely I DON'T understand NOW, nor did I understand THEN how to solve for "A". Wasn't I having enough headaches trying to deal with numbers? And it didn't help matters when mom hired me a tutor that was Miss Elk City. On behalf of teenagers everywhere allow me to proclaim without hesitation or rectification that letters have no place in mathematical equations and a teenage boys worst enemy are hormones. There is little sense taking something that is already mind blowing and making it potentially and perpetually harder.

Whether they be 19 or 90, how many times have you seen the women around you get angry about something and the men in their inner circle refer to them as hysterical? Don't misunderstand, I HAVE seen hysterical women, but in turn I have also seen hysterical men and there isn't a dime worth of difference in the two. The voice register may be a smidge higher or lower, but the problem remains the same. Women however, over the years have not been taken as seriously simply because they have been branded as the weaker sex. Your mad father might take an oversized oil field scrub brush to your back side, but it is mom's wrath that we are all afraid of. It should be pointed out that anger is not unique to either gender which simply makes it a HUMAN emotion. Women are as justified in their anger as men, besides when was the last time you saw a man give birth, unless it was Arnold Schwarzenegger in a Hollywood movie. If a man wants to know what childbirth feels like he should try pulling his bottom lip over the top of his head without the aid of prescription drugs. That last comment comes to you via Carol Burnette, and she is doggone right about it.

Now allow me to brux the cliché "There is nobody angrier than an old black woman." I often wonder if Tyler Perry agrees with that, I'd bet he does. My next-door neighbor who just happens to be an old black woman says this is absolutely true. She told me it's true because her kid's dad never stuck around long enough to help raise them, so she had to be mad enough for two people. Even Rosa Parks could have never had the courage to do what she did unless she was madder than hell and unable to take it anymore. Just remember, the only colors that should be separated are when doing laundry.

If you will remember in the movie about women's baseball (A League of Their Own) there is a part where the girls are required to attend charm school and the instructor is quoted saying "Remember, a lady reveals nothing." Well, isn't that a metaphor and a double meaning? This is saying loosely that what women are thinking and what they are allowed to say are NOT one in the same. Considering the time (the early 40's) that is understandable. But women are often left with untenable situations where their brains are left screaming "are you kidding me" with no outlet. Let me give you a specific example of such a situation. I remember my own mother reading me the riot act over something stupid I had done as a teenager (which I did often) only to have the phone ring; she turned around and answered it in a tone of voice that could only be described as sappy sweet HELLO. Now understand, I don't fault my mother for the social graces she was taught coming up as a farm girl in southwest Kansas, but wouldn't she have been truer to herself if the phone was just allowed to ring?