Somewhere in the deep recesses of my brain, past the moat of my somewhat uncomfortable memories of puberty, down the twisting corridor of repressed anger that was my early twenties, and into a dank broom closet there lies a recipe box full of treasures that as an adult I have come to relish. I should also add I was able to regulate all of that nonsense without therapy. Maybe I should write a self-help book? I have never understood why people refuse to share decent recipes. Just remember, if we don't pass them down to our kids, they will simply die with us. None of us wish to knock at death's door but at some point, we will all be faced with it. Don't take the good stuff to the grave with you, share it. I have a whole bevy of recipes, some made up by me, some clipped from the pages of Field & Stream, and some from granny that I have committed to memory.
My grandma on my dad's side did a lot experimenting with sugar free Jello's. To be fair she was the first diabetic I had ever known so her window of culinary excellence was limited. Trust me when I tell you that NOBODY should EVER put things like whole green grapes or (good Lord forbid) cabbage in orange Jello. That is nothing short of Culinary blastphemy. My granny on my mom's side of the family made the best pancakes known to man. It sounds like such a simplistic breakfast food, and it is, but if it is done correctly it is sublime. Like any cook worth their salt she never skimped on quality ingredients. After we were done milking for the day she never seperated the milk from the cream which is in part why I wattled instead of walked as a pre-teen. In addition, she never used those anemic looking eggs from the grocery store with their squeaky clean shells and barely yellow yolks. In order for eggs to have maximum flavor they need to have at least one feather stuck to them and have a yolk as orange as the Oklahoma sun. The second part of the magic came from the fact that she had an old cast iron skillet that was so heavily seasoned I am certain it helped feed returning World War 2 veterans. I had personally rewelded the handle back on said contraption at least three times for her over the years. That might sound like it doesn't bode well for my welding capabilities, but welding cast iron is not an exact science. Another one of granny's secrets was getting maximum use of the space of her skillet, size ruled the day. She wasn't happy unless she was making cakes big enough to flop over the sides of a full-sized serving plate.
Then came the unique way grandma served those beauties. Instead of using Aunt Jimima Syrup like most folks she instead put Dark Karo on the table. Listen, the lady loved to make candy at Christmas time and that stuff made a great emulsifier. In addition, she lived eighteen miles from town, so some ingredients needed to serve double duty. Judge not lest ye be judged. And don't even think about spreading her pancakes with food coloring and chemicals (here and after referred to as Country Crock), only real butter would suffice. To this day the syrup dilemma perplexes everyone who marries into my family including my own lovely wife. Every time I attend a cousin's reunion I get asked at least once "did you know your cousin puts Karo on his pancakes?" I think old Hank called that a family tradition. Here is grandma's recipe, and keep in mind she didn't measure anything. The woman lived to improvise in the kitchen. One cup flour, one cup milk, one egg, a teaspoon of baking powder, a tablespoon of olive oil (yes, I said olive oil) and a pinch of salt. Why would anyone buy a mix and add water when building it from scratch is truly that easy. Pancake mixes are a sin against humanity and an insult to your kitchen and don't forget you heard it here first.
Every now and then I have a brainstorm in the kitchen that turns into a family hit. I always know when I have hit a home run because there are never any leftovers. I call it taco bake and the recipe could not be any easier. One pound of ground round (that's fun to say isn't it), brown it, drain it. Then in a large bowl add all of the following ingredients and stir. The beef, half cup of water, half cup of milk, one package of scalloped potatoes including the cheese mix, one packet of taco seasoning, one can of diced tomatoes with the juice, one can of whole corn with the juice. Put it in a Pyrex, cover it with foil, and bake at 350 for an hour or until it bubbles. When it comes out of the oven douse it in cheddar cheese until it begs for mercy. Be careful when serving, I have seen my family fight over this dish. You might just end up pulling back a nub of what was formerly your arm.
And of course, my kitchen would not be complete unless I had a good go-to steak recipe. As long as cavemen have been throwing mastodon legs on cave fires there have been long discussions about which cuts of meat are best. However, these days we usually opt for beef. For my money it doesn't get any better than the trusty old KC Strip. It has just enough protien punch to satisfy your meat craving, enough tenderness to treat your tastebuds like a king, (or at least a prince), and just enough fat on the end to make you grin. I know some folks like just won't eat a steak if it is not burned to a crisp but that seems like a real shame. For me mid-rare rules the day which if you are a person that keeps one of those handy thermometers in your pocket is just about 130 degrees. Or if you choose to go the more primative route the same firmness as where your thumb joint meets your hand. Just remember to salt and pepper it liberally but don't bother until it comes off the grill, otherwise all of your seasoning just ends up in your coals. Skip the ketchup, I have always maintained that anyone who would put ketchup on a steak really doesn't enjoy the taste of good meat. Now, let it rest for ten minutes before you go sawing into it, otherwise all of those meaty juices will end up on your plate instead of in your mouth where they belong. While it is resting hit with a dollop of garlic jam, yes, I said garlic jam! I know it sounds off, but your taste buds will thank you. ENJOY my friends.
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